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"Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"
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"Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."
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"God so loved the world that He did not send a committee."
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"Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!"
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"Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday."
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"Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."
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"It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."
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"Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."
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"If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."
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"Forbidden fruit creates many jams."
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A singing group called "The Resurrection" was scheduled to sing at a church. When a big snowstorm postponed the performance, the pastor fixed the outside sign to read, "The Resurrection is postponed."
